Thursday, September 19, 2013

Letter To Bappa.!

Letter To Bappa.!

Phew.........!!!!!! It was horrible outside .Well it struck to me that if it was so hard for someone like me who stay here all the time, to reach my home,it must be suffocating and horrible for Ganesha after all he is our guest for this odd number of days, we invited him to listen to our bhajans ,problems and make lots of food and eat on his behalf. So I thought would write a letter to him, just to explain the reason for whatever this is.

Hi Bappa !

Hope you have a good internet connection up there .My bad I should have written this when you were down on earth we have many WiFi hot spots here. That is fine I am sure this will reach you anyway.

How are you doing?  I know you’re god you must be great, just confirming because you have spent lot of time down here and you must have found our ways very unhygienic,our manners a bit unpleasant and our actions very disturbing. Who knows this better than you that everything happens for a reason. Heads up God we are used to such behavior so please don't expect us to change.

First of all We love you Bappa (we actually fear you, you in the sense all gods because you know to err is human and we do not like the concept of hell).And you must have not noticed we installed atleast two Pandals for each and every street , that costed us a fortune. We go to any extent to show our love even though if it is at the stake our own environment.

Bappa I have heard many stories about your body parts and their significance, I really liked the way it was depicted in the sources that I read from.

Your trunk has the ability to be strong as well as skilled to identify good from bad and also punish bad and help good, well that happened a little late in Nirbhaya`s case but still it happened. Have you seen the new designs of your trunk in the huge idols that were made, got confused looking at your own idol dint you ?

Just like your trunk the other parts have their own significance too ,Do not mind we just made little tweaks.

Your little eyes signify of keen vision and proper understanding of minute details ,oh boy that is not from where we got ours ,you must have seen that on the roads ,we seldom ride or drive with our eyes open .

Your large ears signify patience to hear out to your disciples` bhajans and their problems ,Oh I know what your complaining about ,All the bhajans that you got to listen is only Munni`s Badnami (well where would else Munni go you are her god after all) and some movie songs` parody .Hey btw sorry about the Sheila`s rude words saying "I am too sexy for You" ,she must have not meant that .

Your tusk is considered as the most purest thing in the universe(By the way Kudos that you wrote the Mahabharata with that) ,Many of us may not be knowing that is reason we dunk you under the water (But yeah poachers in this country know the value of an elephant tusk very well) ,so please do not mind about all the uncouth stuff you have seen on the way to your farewell ,like guys puking or peeing standing in front of your idol or in the same van your travelling ,they were hammered and were not able to hold their alcohol ,and let me tell they were celebrating your farewell or else we were not allowed to do booze in public (we owe you this ,thanks) ,still you are the purest form Bappa. Also when we shouted out loud saying "JAI STHNG ELSE" we meant “JAI GANESH MAHARAJ”.I hope you understand It is just that we do not take so much strain of using our sense of not mixing up different things(or it is just the booze talk).

Your belly is said to protect the globe from all the problems ,Please do not think we do not know that by looking at idols we made had perfect six packs ,it is just we don't have a good physique so we rub that on our gods to  have one .

All the points mentioned must have cleared the misunderstanding I guess or it just made even worse either cases you will have to have a big heart to understand that all the deeds are out of love .
We would not have installed so many pandals spent some crores ,can you beileve only the laddu made for you in a place costed 12 lakhs ,which would have sufficed for the flood victims for at least three days .See! we love you more than ourselves(or we fear you).

Well I hope you had a great stay (just saying, trust me I know how it was) .See you in a year this time hopefully in a less harmful form (Not POP) and thank you for all the patience you have shown in the traffic ,believe me if anyone from muggles were in your place things would have been different (Different Bad).
Bye and take care (OF US ofcource ).
                                                    
Moral : This was a personal letter, don’t expect any morals out of this damn it.

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